Male violence victim Helin Palandöken’s father: I told the Prime-Minister it would take two of his hours

Seyhan Avşar
 
The latest victim of male violence, 17-year-old Helin Palandöken, has left behind a tearful father and 12-year-old sister, Nehir. The grief-stricken father, Nihat Palandöken, is accepting condolences at home. He is mourning for Helin with his face pressed into his hands and tears streaming from his eyes. Helin’s school friends, for their part, are waiting at the door of the public building provided for the expressing of condolences. Grief in all its hues is visible on their faces. They are in shock at losing their friend. Father Palandöken lost his wife some five years ago in a traffic accident. He set aside a place next to his wife’s grave planning on being buried there on passing away and says, “I was going to go into that grave. I buried my daughter Helin there. My only dream was for my daughter to get her university diploma. Her death certificate has become her diploma.”
 
The repercussions of migration
 
The Palandöken family, in common with thousands of families, left their hearth and home and migrated to escape poverty and unemployment. In 1987 they left Bingöl in the search for “bread” and migrated, first to Adana, and subsequently in 2001 to Istanbul, supposedly the city whose streets are paved in gold. Father Palandöken explains the reasons for migrating in the following two sentences: “We had one field back home. Which one of us would that be enough for?” With the Palandöken family gradually surmounting all the difficulties ensuing from migration, Helin’s mother Saadet Palandöken suffered a traffic accident on the way home from the factory where she was working. Nihat Palandöken speaks of the indescribable grief they went through in those days but of how Helin stood forever firm: “My Helin didn’t want people to feel sorry for her because she was left motherless. She kept on telling me, ‘Dad, you’re going to stand firm.’ She said, ‘We haven’t got a mum, but we’ve got a dad.’ She was strong. And she wanted us to stand strong.” Palandöken, noting that he and Helin made the meals after the demise of his wife, said, “But I looked out for my Helin. I didn’t want her to fall behind with her studies during term times. I thought it would be better for her to make the meals in the summertime. We cooked and did the housework together.”
 
“I was bowled over”
 
Palandöken is a worker employed on the minimum wage at a leather factory. He did not fritter away the wages he earnt but got Helin the books for her studies. Helin, who was studying IT and technology, used to love stretching out on her bed and reading books. She used to tell her father, “I’ll win a place at a university in Istanbul. I won’t go and leave you.” The grieving father continues his account with difficulty: “I would say, ‘Girl, if you win a place at university, I’ll offer a sacrifice.’ My only dream was for my daughter to get her university diploma. Her death certificate has become her diploma.” Nihat Palandöken, saying there will never be another Helin, describes his daughter as follows: “My Helin was a successful, intelligent and cheerful person. Everyone loved her dearly. She was very attached to me. She shared everything she had with me. My daughter said nothing to me about this affair thinking something untoward would happen to me. She didn’t want to burden me. My Helin kissed and hugged me on the morning the incident happened. That morning I went to Adana to my mother’s grave. I was going to stay the night and return. I got the news in a phone call that came after I had made my cemetery visit. I was bowled over.”
 
Let no more Helins die
 
There is only one thing that Nihat Palandöken wants just now and this is true justice. He says, “Those who kill women and abuse children should be given such punishments that nobody will dare to do this again.” He says, “If justice is not done, I will go from street to street like Münevver Karabulut’s family and seek justice.” Palandöken, saying that the conversation between him and Prime-Minister Binali Yıldırım was censored in the press, says, “I said to the Prime-Minister, ‘Pass laws on the murders of women. This will take two of your hours. A law comes out every day, so why does no law come out to do with women?’ The media only reported what the Prime-Minister said. It did not cover my requests.”