News and tips from those of your number on the outside

Guys, I know that you are in good spirits. Your only trouble is not being able to get much detailed news from outside. Never mind. Do not exaggerate. You will never see days like these again. Lounge about, lay on your backs, keep your spirits up with idle banter.
That does it as far as the joint message goes. Now here is something for each of you individually.

Akın (Atalay),
Make the best of these days. You may not have noticed, but you were about to collapse from overwork. Think, for a while (for example, a week, a month, two months) you do not have to solve Cumhuriyet’s never-ending problems. Read books, take it easy, stretch out on your back and let your thoughts drift. Dream of our visit to Tuscany if we can get our money together. Chianti wine, goat’s cheese and fresh bread.
I know!
Do not worry. Everything here is running like clockwork. I know, they will still pass on tens (hundreds, thousands) of ‘Cumhuriyet worries’ to you through our lawyer friends and ask what they are to do about them, and how. So what? The lawyers are hardly going to be calling by from the crack of dawn until dusk. Enjoy the taste of your freedom my smart friend.

Murat (Sabuncu),
I have some bad news for you. Unfortunately, the young team under Editorial Manager Bülent (Özdoğan) are putting together as good a Cumhuriyet as you or I did, or even better. They have sent sales through the roof. Just to stop it all from going to their heads, I occasionally go up to the editorial floor and wind them up by bawling: “Son, what kind of headline is that? What reports are you carrying? You’re going to make a mess of it.” But to no avail. That Bülent and his team of boys and girls just brush me off, without even lifting their heads from the screens, saying “Old mate, go down to you room, will you? Write your column and deal with the people on solidarity visits.” I’m sure if I let them they would say: “Just keep out from under out feet, that’s all we ask of you.”
I have no idea how they are going to treat you when you get out. A word to the wise.
I kiss you on your sweaty-salty forehead, news-mad General Publication Manager.

Musa (Kart),
I said things about you like, “Let my cell mate rest his weary head a bit,” but they cut me off in midstream. Somebody said, “But he can draw from there, Aydın.” I did my best to stick up for you, saying, “There’s no paint, no thinner and no brushes in Silivri. How can he draw?” They were ready with their reply. They came straight out with, “He can draw in pencil and we’ll colour it in here.” (Just between ourselves, this is not a bad idea but I kept my cards close to my chest. How about you just steer clear of that crowd of loafers?)


Turhan (Günay),
As you know, the TÜYAP Book Fair has started. Our colleagues congregated at the fair yesterday, saying: “There can be no book fair without Turhan.” They staged a demonstration and also talked left, right and centre about you.
Meanwhile, our Deniz Kavukçuoğlu – he is in charge at TÜYAP, you know – was saying, “If there’s no Turhan, there’s no book fair, either.” I mean, he is minded to cancel this year’s fair. That is what they said, but I have been unable to confirm this news yet. I will go to the fair in the coming days and ask Deniz directly.


Kadri (Gürsel),
Both Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton called at different times. They asked, “You know, Kadri was going to come here to cover the elections. We didn’t see him. What happened?” I made up some tale that, “He has withdrawn to his private residence in Silivri to make an in-depth study of the kind of world the Trump – Putin – Erdoğan world is going to be.” They fell for it.


***
Oh no!
I have run out of space.
Önder (Çelik), Mıstık (Mustafa Kemal Güngör), Bülent (Utku), Güray (Öz) and Hakan (Kara) - I will write about you in another Claw Mark. You won’t hold it against me, will you?